He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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