So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
