you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
