God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize
