I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize