Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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