none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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