I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
