In the future we'll all be gay
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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