I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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