can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
