I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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