I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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