just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
He kissed a someone with a penis
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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