you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
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