Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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