spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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