i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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