So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
