You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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