You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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