So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
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If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
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I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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