Got a toothbrush?
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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