He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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