is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
