Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
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