gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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