Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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