I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize
