In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
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