how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize
