just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
