he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
