Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
