i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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