all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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