after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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