theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
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