dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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