I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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