this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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