so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Never underestimate the power of titties
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
