ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
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