why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
