i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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