um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize