these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
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