It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
