Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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