i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Randomize
