I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
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Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
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I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
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